A slightly tongue-in-cheek response to Syl’s post over at Raging Monkeys. Sorry Syl, I just couldn’t help myself!
Dear Healers, Dear Tanks
I appreciate you’re busy people and I thank you for your attention. It’s not often a lowly DPS receives this sort of personal focus from the raiding deities without a “FFS” prepended, so I’ll proceed as quickly as I can.
Many of us in the pew-pew ranks have also been reading about and/or experimenting with the forthcoming changes in the Cataclysm expansion. Some of us have completely new resources to manage, some of us have significantly changed mechanics and all of us are busily relearning. However as DPS we love to spread our attention — a sort of AoE approach to information gathering, if you will, although I understand it is considered OP and will be nerfed in in a hotfix. A large number of us have, in addition to keeping up with the changes to our ability to ‘pwn’ the ‘meters’, also kept close track of the changes to our lovable meatshields and blessed healthbots. We do this because we care. Mostly we care about ‘pwning’ the ‘meters’ but we have long since learned that when dead, our opportunities to ‘pwn’ are significantly fewer. So we too have observed with interest the tales of the new tanking order and the new regime within the glorious people’s republic of healing.
Indeed, and this may seem nigh-on impossible to contemplate, many of us play more than one character1 . Even those of us accustomed to simply rolling our faces across the keyboard, pausing periodically to wipe off the worst of the drool2 often have other avatars with which we play. Not all of these “alt”ernative characters are more damage-dealers – many of us have a healing or tanking character, or perhaps even both, and have therefore been working with the new abilities and new mechanics from a first-person perspective.
If I might speak candidly for a moment, I am very much looking forward to the increased use of some mostly-neglected buttons on my bars, and to a wide variety of challenging content. Doubtless there will be some lessons to learn for us all in the new old world, and I keenly anticipate learning them together and look forward to working as a team being more critical to our shared success. I am though, I confess, rather less enthused at the prospect of being treated like a cross between a simpleton and a disobedient puppy by those in the tanking and healing roles. I implore the colossi who hold our precious aggro and the beneficent ones who ensure our continued life in the face of raidwide damage to remember that DPS are people too. We are human, we sometimes make mistakes but if you cut us, do we not bleed3?
Whilst it may seem prudent, it’s rather disrespectful to assume that your assigned DPS are barely functional automatons. We appreciate literature, visual art and the beauty of the theatre. We have hopes4, aspirations5 and dreams6 just the same as you, and whilst we do not enjoy quite the same symbiotic7 relationship that tanks and healers do, we are part of the team and beg you to treat us if not as equals then at least not as obstacles. Besides, without us this dungeon’s going to last all week!
With apologies for disturbing you,
A member of the great unwashed
A damage dealer
- amazing that we’d have the spare intellectual capacity, isn’t it [↩]
- The changes to retribution will save me a fortune on hardware [↩]
- and shout “FFS, healz?” [↩]
- to top the meters for this fight [↩]
- to top the meters for this raid [↩]
- to top the lists on World of Logs [↩]
- some might say ‘unnatural’ or ‘forbidden’ [↩]